As some of you know, I’m on Lavalife, a huge online dating community.
Normally I wouldn’t admit that I even know what the site is, but I realize no one cares. In this day and age I think we could all use something to make dating a little easier.
Even if it means having to pretend I am a 6’2″ helicopter pilot with a scar.
Lavalife has been pretty decent. I’ve had a few dates because of it, found out that no one wants someone who claims to be a 6’2″ helicopter pilot with a scar and has a PhD in socisexyology, when in fact they are a 5’ 8″ web-geek, with only a BA in socisexyology. I always wind up paying for somebody’s dinner.
Maybe I’m looking for the wrong women. Maybe it’s time to refine the search. Narrow down the field some. Let’s take a look at some of the more unique searches on lavalife, shall we?
Vegetarians who Love to Hunt This is a very small group of women driven by their love of killing, and hatred for meat. Some are here because they checked every single box in the activities portion of the sign in. Some are just plain weird.
Investors with no Money They earn less than 20k per year, but they love to invest. There isn’t a check box for gambling, but I suspect that’s what the investments are from.
Habitual Smoking Fitness Freaks Working out between cigarettes is tough, running is best. They avoid swimming because the lighters don’t work underwater.
3 Foot Tall Basketball Players I couldn’t believe the amount of women online who claim to be 3’ tall. From the photos I can tell some are taller, unless they live in a tiny scale replica of our world. I think that it’s great these women are challenging the social norms and participating in a sport that favors the taller player. More power to them!
Those that prefer not to say what their ethnic background and body type is, but include a photo Very mysterious.
Old White Ladies who Love Rap If you refine a search down to it’s most basic elements you can find some pretty unique people. I looked for anyone over the age of 70 who lists rap music as their main source of inspiration. Oddly enough there is a bunch. But most seem to have accidentally filled in their age wrong, or they have incredible skin for a 103 year old gangsta.
Though fun, some of these searches can lead to scarred brain tissue. There are some mental images that are hard to shake. Use caution on Lavalife and be sure to fill in your form correctly. Unless you are a woman that’s attracted to a man that’s attracted to these kind of women. Then whatever floats your boat.
I am looking for a unique girl, but seeing what I have here, kind of makes me glad I can appreciate someone who is pretty normal (to some degree). If you want to find me on Lavalive I am the 3 foot tall buddhist that speaks Javanese and likes seal hunting.
I like old weird things. I especially love the look of copper plate prints, when they are used in scientific textbooks (Bonus points if they use the word “Plate”).